I don't know how people CAN handle the death of a child so I am certainly not going to tell anyone that they are handling it wrong. I don't think there is a wrong way. Want to talk about a hell? That my friend has to be a "hell on earth" as the saying goes. So to me whatever helps a person cope or get through it to the point they can have one day not filled with pain is fine by me. And as to how long it takes, you can't put a time limit on it. Unless you personally have gone through that hell you can't possibly understand the grief they have. I could go out on a limb and add especially a mother losing her child. And it is not because fathers love their children less. My husband absolutely loves our children as much as I do, but I honestly think a mother's grief is more intense. I guess I will get attacked for that but any mother on here should know what I mean. So semi let me say this, don't worry about what other people think. I don't see it as needing "attention" and if anyone else sees it that way that's their problem.